The Best Music Videos of 2010

The new year is upon us once again, which can only mean one thing: The Best Music Videos of 2010 list. Yes folks, the world's most famous year end list is back, and I'll have to say there are a few surprises. Some new faces pop up in the countdown, but a lot of artists from last year are still relevant. One glaring omission, Lady Gaga. Unfortunately, "machine gun boobs" were not good enough to make the countdown (which proves how amazing this year was for videos). Some other artists who almost made the list include: Trina, Mike Epps, Leighton Meester, Kelly Rowland (respect, that Commander video is crazy!) Any hoo, here is our list of the top ten music videos for 2010...

10. Selena Gomez and The Scene-Naturally (Dave Aude Remix): She makes us feel like natural women. Everything comes naturally for her (we can't say the same for her band, The Scene). David Guetta is soooo 2009, 2010 and beyond belongs to Dave Aude.



9. Sean Kingston feat. Justin Bieber-Eenie Meenie: Justin Bieber eye-fucked his way onto this countdown. The proof is in the video folks. As for Sean Kingston, he ate his way onto the countdown. Eat your hearts out ladies, because if you don't...he will.



8. Miley Cyrus-Who Owns My Heart: Although we wish she would bring back the Party in the U.S.A. vibe, we know that chapter of her life is over. However, we will settle for the bong-smoking, caged bird, club-hopping, scantily clad, raver chick she has grown up to be.



7. Erykah Badu-Window Seat: This video (a great example of artistic expression) tackles numerous hot-button issues, including: political, racial, and sexual. But even Krista Judge can't believe the ass on Erykah Badu. Back, back, back it up and dump it!



6. Nicki Minaj-Right Thru Me: Speaking of backing it up and dumping it...Nicki enters our countdown behind some great artists butt just because she's in the rear, doesn't mean she caused a rumpus when she found out. Ass for the video itself, we wish we could see right thru that shower door.



5. Shakira-Loca: We're loca, loca, loca for this Latin goddess!! As long as she keeps making music and videos, she will be on this list. A one second hip shake would even be enough. When she's 75 and has two fake hips, she will still be on here.



4. Rihanna-Rude Boy: Does she sing about anything other than getting fucked anymore? Seriously, she needs a guy with a big one, that knows how to use it, and can go downtown. If 2010 is any indication of the artistic direction her career is heading in...then we are excited and frightened at the same time!



3. Miss A-Bad Girl, Good Girl: Monsieur Pepe le Peu had four words to say about this South Korean pop group's video: FEI. JIA. MIN. SUZY. We don't know you, we don't know you, we don't know you...but we'd riiiike to.



2. Katy Perry-California Gurls: Machine-gun boobs weren't good enough for this countdown but you know what were...Whipped-Cream Boobs! Katy Perry teamed up with SnoopDogg for this summer smash, and it is still melting our popsicles in sub-zero temperatures.




1. Ciara feat. Ludacris-Ride: On the sixth day, God created Ciara's Ride video. On the seventh day, he masturbated.

An Intelligent Discussion About God and the Universe

A recent text conversation between Monsieur Pepe le Peu and myself, began as any normal chit chat would. Just as we were about to end our friendly exchange, it took a turn down an entirely different path. It all basically started with one word: word. From that starting point, a discussion of religion, politics, science, world history, literature, pop-culture, Greek mythology, time travel, and existentialism commenced. All of the following statements are fact-based and can be backed by numerous references.

Alain Charnier: Are you staying down there the rest of the week then?

Mosieur Pepe le Peu: Probably I might come back Monday.

AC: Word.

MP: To our mothers

AC: To all the mothers of the world

MP: To all the mothers of the universe, both human and alien alike.

AC: To God's Mother, the creator of God. Who in turn, created all the human and alien mothers.

(It gets a little contentious here) MP: Shut up you Catholic! This goes out to Big Bang's mother, the mother of all mothers.

AC: Sorry Pepe, but even Big Bang's mother had a mother...

AC: Big Momma Bang

AC: Starring, Martin Lawrence

MP: Sorry Alain, even Big Momma has a mama and a papa. Mama Cass Immortality versus the ham sandwich.

AC: No Need to apologize Pepe but as you already know... The ham sandwich that Mama Cass Immortality so viciously choked on, was once a pig. This pig had a mother, who's father happened to be Babe the Pig. And Babe's mother was married to a pig named Wilbur. You might remember him from Charlotte's Web...

AC: So my point is, the universe was created by Arnold from Green Acres, the father of Wilbur.

MP: You obviously aren't taking the Muslim perspective into account because god would never be associated with pigs. The true god is George Orwell author of...

MP: Animal Farm

AC: I'm familiar with your false idol/demi-god Orwell. As you know, Orwell wrote it in reference to Stalin, who many Russians (god fearing men themselves) feared. So was Stalin the one true God??? Of course not. This was refuted when...

AC: Marty McFly was time traveling in his DeLorean and stopped in 1955. Then Bill and Ted picked him up and traveled to 1948, where they picked up Orwell.

AC: They all then traveled to 1984. This is where they listened to, and loved the album 1984 by Van Halen.

AC: Soon after there was a struggle for the reign of power over men, between one Eddie Van Halen and David Lee Roth. Roth claimed victory, left the group and released the subsequent single, California Girls.

AC: Written by the real God, Brian Wilson.

MP: This anti-pinko commie bastard libel means nothing, burn in hell with McCarthy. Is God the holy trinity with David Lee Roth, Eddie Van Halen and Sammy Hagar?

AC: This is all chronicled in Stephen Hawking's book: A Brief History of Time

MP: Everyone knows Brian Wilson was a puppet of the one True God, Charles

MP: Manson

MP: Key point, A Brief History of Time.

MP: What Hawkings didn't know, was that an Event Horizon can bend space, time, and matter. Thus, making Laurence Fischburne.

AC: The holy trinity is the aforementioned Babe, Wilbur and Arnold.

AC: As for Larry Fischburne...

AC: In Greek mythology he's known as Furious Styles, Styles is the father of Tre. Tre had a pack of wild Snow Dogs, he endured a long and arduous Boat Trip to a place known in the modern world as Daddy Day Camp.

AC: The director of this camp was an evil tyrant named Fred Savage.

AC: Savage is called The God of the Little Monsters by the Greeks. He ruled supremely throughout a time period now referred to by historians as, The Wonder Years.

MP: Kevin was his real name. Thus my complex is complete.

AC: You have a Paul but no Winnie Cooper.

MP: Going 100 in my Mini Cooper.

AC: Or a smart car but you're pushin' a cart from King Soopers.

MP: Got it suped up and fit for a king.

MP: Just picked up the last six-pack of Oberon. Fucking heaven

AC: Did you know, Oberon (also spelled Auberon) is a legendary king of the fairies in medieval and Renaissance literature. He is best known as a character in William Shakespeare's play, A Midsummer Night's Dream, in which he is Consort to Titania, Queen of the Fairies...

AC: I'll stop, good beer though.

MP: You bored or what?

AC: Dying of boredom, I copied that last blurb from Wikipedia.

MP: Me too, just got done with a long shift outside of Chicago.

AC: Oh man, I know that stretch.

MP: Worse stretch than Mandingo on a virgin. P.S. Mandingo came up in predictive text.

AC: I have something jumbling in my head with predictive text and protective sex, but I can't connect the dots yet.